little miss or mr?

We are 19 weeks along now, I know i have been really bad and getting the blogs out this pregnancy, i have just been very tired, unorganized, grumpy, all of the above and blogging has gotten pushed to the bottom of the list. Its coming around the time, actually THIS FRIDAY to find out if this little one is a little miss or mr and we have taken a bit of an (what seems to be) unusual but totally traditional approach to it... WE AREN'T FINDING OUT. thats right I,  'the planner' am not finding out!!! Its funny I was soo unsure about this at first, my husband suggested it as what an amazing surprise it would be to push this little one out and learn who they are but the more I don't know, i can see the fun it is, a few friends have done it and said it was ah-mazing, just the best surprise ever. and now I think I have just settled with the idea of not knowing. I think' i am ok with not knowing. So it leads for a bit of fun for the next 20 weeks, boy or girl? This pregnancy is totally different than the first. So here is the list.

• I started to gain in my hips and waist filled in first (I haven't gained much weight but what I have gained you can see! With Jack it was just in the front)
• you have already see it in my face! JUST WRONG in my opinion.my face didn't start filling in till th end with jack
• I feel like I look like death (lol) but seriously, I'm definatly not the graceful, gleaming preggo I was with Jack, my skin is different, I am getting zits, I have never had zits!! not even in highschool. I look bagged all the time, can't seem to erase those bags under my eyes, and blotchy discoloration and ugh. yuck.
• Belly is wider and higher (does that make sense?) I was looooow and out with jack, this one I'm all thick, and now starting to go out.
• no morning sickness with this baby. a couple gags but that's about it. I barfed A LOT with Jack.
• Cravings: SWEET AND SALTY!  chips and a chocolate bar, delish and tons of milk. With Jack it was all about Sour pickles. 
• Heart Rate: all over the place, 167, 150, 152, 137. Keeps me guessing.
• i am GRUMPY!! crazy emotional this time bordering neurotic, irritable, psycho. 

I'm trying to think of anything else, I am definitely making pregnancy sound grand! but it really is just the reality of this one, but I feel fine. I have very little discomfort minus the random muscle pull or back ache, and I am sleeping, I have a pretty normal appetite, I am able to run around and play with my little guy and that is what I love! I guess every pregnancy is different, can't help but notice how different and wonder... but pink or blue I will have fun playing the guessing game until the end :)