Tuesday, January 4, 2011

First day back

well it is my first day back... i'm not really sure what to think of it. As I sit here writing this, I am staring out a massive wall of windows in the really beautiful office I work in, surrounded by a massive marble desk and friendly'esk faces. A job that has been really worked around what I would like. I have enjoyed smiling and helping people and doing simple stress free tasks, but still I am still sad.. I would rather be home with my babe, chasing around that silly little man full of giggles and smiles.

mommies that work full time, how do you do it?

My little part time job is even painful for me.

I haven't yet had a cry, he is with Grandma and Grandpa today, I know he is safe and having a silly time. Which I think will be an easier transition. I'm not sure if for me or him but it will be easier. but what about when he goes to someone less familar? This is a hard thought for me. What if he is scared, or feels abandon during nap time, his mommy not there to snuggle him when he cries?

ohhh I am killing myself here, I have to stop.

back to work... it's only 2 days a week, and a 3rd every other but it's still hard. I miss my little man.

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